Monday, June 17, 2019

Why won't the police be able to listen?

My dad sometimes sounds like he's talking when he makes noises, using the noises to sound like talking.

He is trying to be suggestive and follow along and abuse an older lady I like emotionally and affect her physically like in how she looks, if it's good or something's wrong with her...
My dad is a constant fight.
Is that guy still mad at me?  Who else???
This is so pestering.  I got over it ruined Father's Day last night when I left like anyway probably.
Is it this one person giving me problems?
I think I got in trouble for this shit.
Did you know my dad is really a racist or believes it is inevitable?  Maybe, he's a problem, like others?
Some things were going good.  Do you have to ruin it?
I had just wanted her to lay off.  The people monitoring me in private won't leave me alone.  They paused the typing like they have a point.
My dad is still mad about me with the Asian girl.

It's like the older lady I like did it, rubbed in that girl.  The people monitoring me in private are sitting there...
I just got abused for saying I wasn't mad at her.
I never said I was mad at her.
Something strange about how the last page loaded.
So, you now, I don't want to be mad at the older lady I like and am not.  Even if she did it, it's okay, but I am guessing she didn't do anything that was not okay.  People might be picky and shin a light to be convinced otherwise.

Hurt

I feel that people are setting me up to hurt me because I accidentally said the same thing back someone else said to me and they can't get over it even if I apologized and took it back.
They suddenly got social and made it their business.  They keep trying to beat me into submission.
They're mad I left my dad to post abuse on me with people making an Asian try to talk to me if I look her up telling her my personal life just because my mom is Asian.

Sunday, June 16, 2019

It's too bad I can't handle this or get beyond the confines of the bad part of the Orlando area.
He does it symbolically like he has a reason to hurt the older lady I like.  Like, he might arrange things in the house in an erotic way.
I know there must be something I'm not thinking of.

My dad is using little things to get really mad, like how I deal with my money.
What's it mean now?  Another workout for my aunt to judge?
I don't want to see these annoying people pop up in the older lady I like.
He's ruining it for me.  Stop him.
It feels like she falls for my dad's inappropriate sex.
Whoops?  I can't post it all.
I just came here to post a little and they torture the older lady I like and ruin her.
They keep being mean talking to me and are racist and think I'm not as white, when it's inappropriate to say...which I think I am more white than other people who are white.
I don't accept this cute abuse popping up from others to ruin the older lady I like.

Why is this my life?
They adjusted the timing of my page loading to say something when I want my peace.
I think I am hurt.
They keep saying the older lady needs to be stimulated out of nowhere and it ruined our relationship and I'm in trouble for it.
There are bad people in my life.
They must be jealous of me in my past life.
Are the people monitoring me in private keeping it up, rotating, attacking me?  It's not funny.
"No one gives a care."

Can you just give it a rest?  Why does everyone know the older lady I like and it supposedly ruined our relationship maybe?  I thought it was dangerous, it's not like I wanted it to happen but they did it.
I said the problems aren't stopping.
They keep ruining my life if they dislike what I do.  They are jealous of how I seem racially.  They are too lazy or just singling me out.
I can't say no don't go away.  They have it in them that I never meet the older lady I like in their decision.
I was just relaxing and they came in.
What can I do?  I didn't do anything.
They won't stop.
They keep just popping up and ruining my life.  I have to practice violin and learn German.
What?  I didn't do anything.  They are fuzzy.  What am I going to do?  Those mean people, who did this?
Someone else is fighting me.
What?  They said it was over.
They are having someone follow me closely and it's annoying.
They keep finding new ways to ruin my life like I'm keen on listening.

They said I did something and my relationship is ruined.
Those cars are still whining sure I'm in trouble.
My dad just does something and thinks it will happen to the older lady I like.
My dad feels guilty and secretly blames me for my mom's death overall.
They won't cease to believe I have succumbed to the idiocy.
I don't like the people monitoring me in private most all the time.  I've been wasting my time on them throughout the whole day.
My dad thinks he can take away big things from me for no related reason.
Why am I just here all day putting up with these antics?
The cars outside won't stop.
There are people annoying me following me, and supposedly the people I like made them do it.
A car outside "knows" what happened and said my dad said it was forever, that the older lady is nothing to me.
It seems like my dad keeps trying to stimulate the older lady I like and make her hungry for it.
They keep playing around leaving me more clues, messages, "what have you."  I post one and do something, the next big thing comes.
My time is being wasted.
More and more just keeps coming from Orlando!
The people monitoring me in private are still looking for attention.
Actually, I do "get along with others."
I don't have anything against the older lady, but I think I'm not supposed to trust her now.
Supposedly my dad can listen in private and said I was shit, like I'm just okay with that.
Why are the people monitoring me in private making it like I'm not good enough to not do this.  I don't have to pay for my relationships because of you.
The people monitoring me in private think if I post here that the older lady I like is mad at me and *rejecting* me.
What's bothering me is I get stuck with people annoying me while the older lady I like is worshiped, also maybe involved like she has these bad things happen to ruin it for me maybe, like that's all anyone will ever "let" me amount to.  It's getting "disgusting."  I didn't agree to all these people dominating me and singling me out as shit..., and it's like she of the people monitoring me in private is mad at what I do in private with it.
Those cars outside won't stop whining like they swear they were told I'm in trouble.
I hear those cars outside whining lying that I must be in grave danger in my relationship with an older lady.
My dad was acting like I was lied to about their good nature ever since they might have made themselves exploited over me.
Boy, this sucks.
I thought I could be proud.
How long will someone be messing with me online every time I check their page?  The other person blocked me in the end.
People keep saying an older lady I like is participating in outlandish things against me and trying to tick me off for whenever.
I just heard a noise and it might mean someone is in aw pretending I succumbed as they all seem to be feeling.
It seems like they had someone ruin my relationship with an older lady or something important now in it by sending a psych out, as though it won't get better.  It seems like they are putting a lot of thought into this like they're gay.  It's gay for me to come back and talk to them about this, just emergencies and weird things.
They are acting like they have a hold of me again.
I was gonna maybe post here now ... and they keep acting weird about things.
I'm right.  This is important.
They think I'm in trouble to bother to post here.
Apparently, something is wrong with them.  They think they are cuter when they're acting stupid or feeling useless.
They keep being mean about my posting here.
Why can't they stop?  I guess something must be done, intervene.
What's wrong with the people monitoring me in private?
This just in.  They acted like they said they made the older lady I like unable to do anything and nothing to me.
I can see them take everything.  I don't talk about it to the older lady.  I'm sorta already after people who did this and made it look attractive when it didn't even help, except maybe the idea I don't matter and people go in and mess with my life.
It might be too bad for some for all they tried.
The people monitoring me in private want me to lose things I get like they gave them to me.
I just got the idea they'd do that to the older lady but not other people.
They do come on all special like they have something to announce but not quite right.  I'm not sure what they're going to do, but they are appalling some of the influence on what happens to my life, like some people think they are magic to me and therefore they have overcome me, "man to man."
It's like I can't say anything.  I don't know because everyone thinks I'm sarcastic when others are and I'm not.
They want me to sit here and nod at them or else.
So, someone did some things for me, and other people supposedly are trying to take it away.
It's not cute how it's a party I'm pretended to be in trouble and everyone else is fine.
I'm not sure what everyone's useless babble is about, the people who think they know me because we've met or spoken rather briefly, like they can tell the tale on my life, like there's something best to mess with.  I have tried to speak with them.  I used to be respected.  How can this happen?
They're not here to pack their bags and go because they were already supposed to be working on that.
They can't seem to stop saying things now.
So, they act like maybe it's okay but they're not kidding about some things.  I just wanted to say.  Maybe, I don't do much, but that is certified, bonafide trash, filling an unavoidable void.
They are delirious and inconsiderate if they think they can go in and present their idea like that, which I disagree with.  Whoever said anyone wanted this, their meanness?
I dunno, maybe they act like they are kidding, but they are just so annoying.
What's with Orlando cruising around in supposed innocence? like they've been able to settle their business.
When will these people stop.  They regenerated.
The people monitoring me in private have them up doing this.  I don't think it's a good idea, and I think it's crass.
Their next dumb ditzy idea was to push for not caring about me in some way.  How outspoken.  It's not really their place.  How abhorring.
The people monitoring me in private think they have a command over me.
There are annoying, incompetent people in my life trying to make decisions for me reaching in like they are doing an older lady I like a favor to ruin our relationship.

Saturday, June 15, 2019

So, Orlando makes my life evolve at a more rapid pace concentrating on nightmares from trouble.
It's always like "Orlando" had a long talk and came up with some new way to destroy my life.  What are they holding out for that is bad to happen to me so they can finally forget about me?
People keep acting on the verge of something and then it turns out they "know something" to do with my relationship with an older lady and now they think they can take things away in her place.
If they didn't exploit the older lady, she wouldn't be ruined.
I can't stop like things are okay.
People won't stop going over the top trying to affect and change and older lady I like from me somewhat permanently.
I get in trouble for little things that are not really bad and it hurts me or my relationship with an older lady.
I felt I was told by the people monitoring me in private maybe I would look older, less pleasure in a childlike way or something, and then I just look more disinterested, and older.

What's going on? What do you want?

Why would anyone just blankly out of nowhere stare and nod and seem to say it's too bad for me the older lady I like is gonna be taken and exploited - that's tacky.  Explanation ever? after all these years of stuff?
Why can it be a last resort to say I'm bad to post here?
For some reason, it bothers me people talking about the older lady I like in ways that punish me like I'm in trouble like it's too bad.
Someone for some reason calculated they could talk over me like I'm bad.
I can't feel comfortable sometimes.
They are acting like I did something wrong by posting here and put the older lady away from me to be ruined from my by someone else.  Everyone's "in."
My little brother is still caught up in the irony of me being seen as did something wrong by my dad and his constant torture like I'm not all that.
They think I did nothing good when I'm just stuck with something bad.
No!  What is wrong with you?  I didn't say I thought that.
They won't stop and are making more problems-
What do you think I am?

They just reacted like this is their moment.
I keep being overflowed with mean messages and "actions."
Suddenly, they came up with another reason to say it's not that bad but maybe still some bad, though they think I was bad.
They keep acting like I'm not a lady.  It's probably their fault.  I have to wait for money to get new clothes.
I feel they want to stop the older lady from talking to me etc.

If they didn't do these problems, we wouldn't have these problems.
The people outside are saying she's being transformed from me.  Why can't they just leave my relationship alone?  They are up to no good.
Hey, I didn't do anything, what are you waiting for?  Why are they upset if I post here.  When they do something it feels like it's dangling from me, and so I put it here, instead.
Well, they just changed the Google search icons, any suggestions?
They keep making up stuff like I'm not a lady.
They think I'm not a lady like the older lady I like so she gets everything.
I said they were being mean more.
They want me to accept what they do and not post here.  I got mad and hit my sofa etc. when I could not get it out some other way like this.  They don't allow physical anger, even alone.
I felt something and suddenly it means the older lady is involved and people monitoring me in private did it.
The people monitoring me in private keep acting like I succumbed.
They are teasing me that I can't have the older lady because she didn't start the idea of monitoring me in private.
Supposedly, a famous person hurting my relationship with an older lady woke up to that I was posting how, and now they are promoting repeating the name of the older lady I like to ruin her, so she won't care about me.  They're all dreaming she's to fly to her, like she's all that anyway when she's mean.

So, I started to report her here, and now they spread around personal information about an older lady I like.

They also said I couldn't meet her and admitting things I'm not supposed to talk about.
Someone wants to try to exploit the older lady I like again, "caught red-handed."  She thinks it's the thing to do and makes excuses but just wants to hate on me.
People are breaking out because I said what someone did without naming them and did it more than once or twice.  They supposedly won't stop.  Nothing to worry about that I said it.

Sometimes I don’t know if something is a secret message and it hurts me like Operant conditioning.

I het secret messages I’m not sure if I got.

My relationship keeps getting ruined sneakily.

They keep bothering me technically for no reason.

Why did someone have to get antsy snd lose it and say to listen to someone they admitted were wrong and to keep going and acting approving they take my relationships as a suggestion, people I meet.

The people monitoring me in private won't stop, like the older lady let them.

I got threatened...

Someone is doing many things against my relationship with an older lady.  She wants her to have a relationship with some younger girls but instead.

My aunt wants my relationship for her daughter, my younger cousin.

My oldest aunt made me feel off so I couldn’t text fast anymore a few years ago.

They just had a big one.  One of them seems like they are being dorky and self-satisfied, the favorite who silences everyone when they walk in the room, going against me and regaining fuel.  I feel submissive to just sit here and take things in stride.

People I know are claiming an older lady I like has vouched for their passage of ruining my life and dislocating and confiscating our relationship.

Friday, June 14, 2019

I have also been "kicked out" and told I am indecent to remain or return.
Orlando can't keep its "big mouth shut."
Why is Orlando so negative?  They are a nuisance to life itself.
People keep acting like I'm in trouble and they're not and can't be.
The people monitoring me in private act like I'm in trouble, but I can do whatever I want.
Someone wants to wait and not yet talk to me but come up when I want to talk to someone else and ruin the relationship intervening insecurely sometimes a lot.
It's rude for Orlando to ask why there is a problem because they helped.
According to what's current, someone destroyed my life forever in destroying a relationship I had with an older lady.
The people who want to affect the older lady I like and invade her peace ... what if we dropped them in the Middle East?
I'm pretty mad at whoever is acting like or trying to ruin the older lady I like.
I get to hear the battle cries of Orlando, convinced it's always over with.
Someone keeps attacking my relationship.
They don't do much but get really mad at some things.
The people monitoring me in private keep bothering me with stupid things and pretending I'm a bad person.  My aunt must have some problem, too, thinking if I show any physical sign of anger it's over and big things get taken from me.  What a lie, she used to act like she thought I was so amazing.
Over and over.
I'm just waiting for them to come back and do the same thing.
It's not even acceptable.
I mean how viscous they are.
It's such an unbelievable joke.
My dad and his sisters are being mean to me, and unfortunately so was my younger cousin.  It's like their a vicious cat ready to claw, I know they are mistaken and just violent and upset about their life and want to take something from yours for no reason, some abstract thing that doesn't even pertain.  This has got to be some joke of a family.  They don't even know me.  Why are they suddenly involved to take from my life?  Are they competing with me, coming to my life?  They are just so objectionable and don't realize it.  Why are the people monitoring me in private letting this happen?  Maybe, they have the same problem.
I don't like her domineering attitude over me.  I just messaged her because I didn't want her to get upset at me with her daughter seeming to secretly fight me.
My aunt seems upset with me and is telling me what to do.  It's like she wants to ruin a relationship she knows about I have for her daughter.  She's just started before whining about it, like it's not for me.  I was worried it would affect my relationship, and she blatantly brought up time and trashed me, when I'm the one who's always good.
Some of Orlando, you just can't leave them alone.  My life as evolved out of sanity.
They don't want me to be happy with the older lady!
What if ... my dad still has to say ... "that woman still will talk to Christina" after all she's done?  I want them both to be okay.
You know, the messages from this person keep coming.  Same with when I saw others I thought didn't care to communicate with me appropriately.
They want this person to affect me like some dork for the rest of my life and thereafter, what dorks.
They keep ruining the older lady I like for me.
Everyone is avoiding all these famous people since it was publicized on purpose an older lady I like I met.
They said they are making someone touch me all over a lot without me knowing how I don't want.
I could see my dad saying that yes the older lady I like was overly aroused to be ruined for me because I did something he has a problem with, which might not really mean much anyway.

Also, I'm convinced Orlando thinks she's not important to me but their kids are to them for instance.

Thursday, June 13, 2019

It's like they're all fancy with their gadgets like I'm just shit dealing with emotional abuse and this.
So what, we can still blame the people directly involved or just all of them about maybe.
They and the public are hypnotized that I'm inappropriate but kinda like Johnny Depp too being cool.  They say why not try the older lady I like, like my relationship to her is "up for grabs."
See, it is a problem, in the end, pretending I'm in trouble to that degree.
Why are there always problems about me going around here, I hear the cars outside, even some with my earplugs in.
Don't act like that all did not just happen.
I'm tired of dealing with this stupidity.  It just comes back.  More is made.
Why does my relationship keep coming up.  Can you stop.
When will these violent animals stop ruining my life?  Not "are they" but "when."
The cars are whining selfishly like they are sure I am sadly in trouble.  I don't care.
My relationship is being compensated because I e-mailed my aunts about a problem.
I'm being threatened...
I guess it's my responsibility.
They keep teasing me like the older lady I like is dumping me for others in extreme and far out ways that don't seem to even make sense or exist.  I'm not even the one who wants everyone obsessing about her all the time, but if that's what it is...
So, like my dad demands... it's getting worse and worse.

I don't want to be bossed around.
No, I did the right thing ^because I wanted to^.
I'm not allowed to complain about stuff like it's okay.  This is bad, and I sense other thoughts coming to them.  They just keep being annoying.  It seems like it's gone too far.  I can't do anything without them getting mad.
The people monitoring me in private etc. keep bothering me.

They are saying someone I know is getting closer than me to someone I like in a teasing way when I do something, like I wrote a note to some people about someone else.

The people on Twitter I follow about places are mad at me for being from Southeastern Florida.  Like, are you gonna tell me where you're from?
People in Orlando all swear an older lady said what they said, so they can save up for something big and call it off.
Some people have things happen to them without saying anything.
Why do some people like it when something stupid happens and it's no one's fault? and I get in trouble?  People are crazy who believe that.
I don't care if people are jealous of things they shouldn't be aware of.  Mind your own business.
Funny when it seems things are given to me I didn't ask for and what I should have in some form taken from me.
My dad being mad ruined my life.
It seems like I'm always in trouble with some things even if I'm nice.
I know they have a VIP to do mean things to me because of my past being psychiatrically beaten in Orlando, like there must just be something wrong with me because though these people were doing it they thought it was impossible.
It's getting uncomfortable sitting here with the people monitoring me in private after it was sworn I would always be on about someone how I don't want because it's not even realistic and is schizophrenic.
So, still, they are doing things to me I can't live with.
So, they are messed up from the start, saying it's okay to hurt me socially, emotionally, etc.  They think they need to affect my relationship negatively a lot with an older lady, pretending it doesn't matter, when what I do does minutely but I'm not helped so much in a way.
So, did you know they acted like someone was bothering me while someone else was being elated in some way that was against me, like the opposite, for a silly reason?

They have all this on schedule, but I wonder what was affected negatively.  They think they are so cool.  They have certain people doing it, too, like "real people" who aren't monitoring me in private. They are messed up, like it's okay if it's me, like "taking advantage of" my good nature.  I'm not sure why I was in that much trouble to begin with.  Was it just because of my dad?  Strangers don't do it who are nice, too, though.  I think I already seem to have automatically taken that into consideration.  I know people seem to make it worse like they're on schedule, like my dad can trust anyone to do anything for him because he is whiter than me, people go by.

I have been trying to forget about it, as I'm not supposed to be posting about this to them.  It came up and things got in the way.

Sometimes, this gives me an outlet.  I can post my real feelings on my regular blog, unless it's something like this.  It would clutter up my blog, as it always has.  It sees like I'm posting less and less here.

I think the older lady I like is in some position against me, put there too.  Oh well?  What can you do?  Does it matter still, like I say?  I don't want to be on people's bad lists, even if I don't talk to them.

So, let's hope for a good time and things we like.

Wednesday, June 12, 2019

I had trouble finding some way to tweak what I said.  I couldn't see what was wrong except people think they know what I really think.
So, you all want to know what I think about something?  It seemed like the trouble was amp'ed and I was sick of it being my life or for me to follow on autopilot, what could go wrong?

Delayed Response

Much of Central Florida seems not to be worthwhile with their delayed response like they have a brain or care sometimes.

"...and a cherry on top!"

I realize we have problems, but Central Florida just wants to make it worse and come off innocent and still in the way at the end.
They're being sneaky ruining my relationship.
Why did they say something stupid, claiming the older lady I like is responsible?

They think I'm more perverted than other Asians or mixed Asians.  It was in the context to get away with something.  It's something specific, not the obvious confession.
Someone is threatening the older lady I like to a gradual early death.
Why do I hear some or most/all of the cars outside ruining my life?
I'm not here to go through this useless drama.  I had goals.  Perhaps, people who have already achieved a goal think I'm awkward to have any left to fulfill, like it doesn't exist for anyone to have goals anymore after they have achieved one.
I am just in limbo with people ruining an older lady they like.  Isn't it gay how they think they're a part of my life, when they are just mad at me?  How can they just tell me what to do and think they get away with it?  This has gone on indefinitely.

You know, it's funny they think they can do whatever they want to me and it's okay if they're wrong, like everything is anyway, but single me out like I'm bad to get upset on my blog like this.

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

It's what "they" are, it won't be solved, not so much now at least.  They are just that way.  That's what they do.  It's not something the did.
They just can't stop thinking I'm in trouble and swearing just the older lady I like is being mean.

Explanation

"They" were going crazy hiding that they thought I was no good, holding me like a hostage, while they pampered an older lady I like in some opposing fashion.  I didn't even mean to bring it up, though, but they are challenging me like, "Oh, I know why," but they just disagree.  They can't leave my relationship be.  I'm not the trouble of the world that deserves to be miserable over all socially.

If anything, they want to do this ceremonially and like a party like Mardi Gras but not quite right.  I wonder why me being in trouble comes in the bundle because I disagree "on that note."  Maybe, it made it worse for whatever was taking place here.
I hear cars outside saying the older lady I like is ruining my life.
I sense some people being crazy.
They are hurting me because they don't like what I post my blogs.  The older lady is supposedly a disappointment inflicting me and the people monitoring me in private sending stupid messages.
They keep acting like something big happened and I'm tired of this.
Those wining cars!

What's with the complacency with me going around?  Are you just trying to get some action and get me in trouble with the older lady I like, just an unimportant inconvenience?
So, you wanted me to sit here muddled out or reflect on trash.
People think they ended generations because of me...
They are posing like they are okay, aha ha ha.  That's if I'm in trouble.
Everyone is still waiting for my next reaction A.K.A. for me to "make a move."

Like, I go back to thinking and feeling something and realize people are watching me and tempering me around the globe in disgraceful and unforgivable way.
It's a little sick the conditions I'm kept in and the way the older lady I like is pampered with exploitation over, away from, and negatively in relation to me.
Why can people who barely know me, which is everyone, like "court" the older lady I like?
The people monitoring me in private like to reinterpret what I mean if it draws a picture as a message that is sort of watermarked to mean something else to get across what everyone knows anyway what I really feel, with a secret message or whipping message.
So, I'm being sacrificed and enslaved to the exploited pleasure of the older lady I like.
I feel I'm being done things against.  They fly through the cracks.
Why did these "bad" people, in Orlando, have to ruin it for me?
I'm hurt.
The cars outside are picky.  They were hypnotized.
I see you all didn't.
I asked politely.
No, this is all I get sometimes, unless I drown it out by speaking to someone.
Why is this okay?  What if it happened to you?
It seems like things took off like I'm a werewolf.
So, I found what we were looking for, now what do we do?
Oh, so the problem comes from where the problem is.
If the older lady people claim not to like me and I need to know, then why would she care?  The only issue was I wasn't her mom.
I can still be in a relationship at the dumped stage.
I think I was dropped, or dumped.  That or people are just shit to me.
Why are older people stealing my relationships? or rather my relationship with an older lady I like?
Is anyone else's life on track?  Does it matter???
Why isn't my life on track?
I don't really enjoy these puzzles, I hate them like demonic presence.
Ha ha, some joke, nothing matters.
This has been a nasty experience.  People just can't "forget it."
I feel too tense, like a robot.
Why make her forget about me?  Must be convenient, then, to get by but "walking over" me.
It looks like Orlando "spoiled" her in this perspective.
I thought she didn't do that part, not everyone does.
They think I was trying to go against the older lady, but she can't "think about" what I said.  So, they took it for what they knew I felt.
So, the older lady is going against me, the cars said.
Oh, why does the lady need to go against me?
"This is so stupid."  This is just some Ring Around the Rosie.
Why are the people outside swearing the older lady just threatened me to death?
I keep hearing cars outside, and now I'm being threatened when I open up and talk and feel okay because they know how badly I really feel about their shit.  They said I'm upset with the older lady because she feeds them everything they say.
Okay, they are trying to get me to always think of someone, but I can't seem to stop it.  It's just better than if it were someone else, in this aspect of it.
This isn't the experience, sorta the opposite.

(continued)

It's not something you do, it's all you can ever be, "no pun intended."
So, fine, speak English, you all are a problem.
The people monitoring me in private just reported the older lady I like just stupidly threatened me using death as an example.

They keep acting like all the time someone is talking to me, but if I go with it and ignore it they'll say it's to ruin it for me and say I'm bunched together with them like I'm just trash to the older lady I like.  She supposedly didn't have problems with me, but I keep getting this shit.  I wasn't gonna post about it, but "the natives are getting restless."
People keep going psycho with these secret messages about an older lady I like.  The people monitoring me in private are watching me to see if I think something they don't want me to, like it's my little way of communicating to the world.
They're inconveniencing me... or will later if not now, like if I say what they did.  It's probably because my mom died they do anything they want.

They won't stop.  I need to get this to stop.
I need some flexibility.  They're not "Grammarly."  So what if I don't usually address my posts to "you?"  It's my thing.
Why do they think they can do this?
They are trying to get attention and seem to have too much time to waste.
I'm sick of all these stupid suppositions.  I find myself here posting problems.
They just keep making my life worse and worse.  It might be other people's faults, too.  However, they might just be abusing me, whatever the reason.  That's just what some people out there are, interjections to ruin a happier life.
They won't stop making a big deal out of that I addressed my posts saying, "You."
Nothing big just happened... and here we are.
The people monitoring me in private are upset because I said "you" in the past here.  They're making a big deal of it, like I have to go back and erase yet another thing in this trash blog.
So, what if it wasn't the public but that people were hypnotized by these people?  Then, I'm to put up with this.  I think the only problems were 1 that my dad has a grudge on me and 2 I'm not as motherly with excuses like being from an abused generation, being mixed race, being from a strange family apparently, etc.
The people who keep interjecting me somehow, like how the computer loads and little ticking noises sometimes, and monitoring me in private ... keep acting like my dad or to settle him and I feel like I'm suffocating.  It kinda abhors me that other people would never have to go through this.  I just got ticked, and no I'm not talking about "the starving kids in Africa" or "bad parenting."  I'm talking about me and noticing something that's unfair because life is unfair.  I'm not really in on all this.  I think they want to "contain" me and let life unravel like this, in their innocent aspect.  They don't seem to have a point.  Why did they offer me something and then take it away and blame me that no one is excited, about the older lady I like awaiting her fame? and fortune.. and the feelings!  I guess she's going to be happy and maybe in this way, but for some reason people suddenly turned on me but still wouldn't leave me alone.  I might be able to deal with the world, but I'm wondering what to do about the older lady that people keep alluding to because I try to mind my own business but can't seem to have a social life without this and then coming home and people being mean to me emotionally so much maybe since a young age or forever.  I just felt slighted for talking about the older lady like I have anything to do with her, but who does?  Did I just drop out?
They were joking that this wouldn't end because they're gay.
Do you think it hurts when something I post is considered unimportant like I've been posting?
The people monitoring me in private act mean to me a lot / "all the time."  Is that so my dad can feel comfortable?
What if people stay this way?
My issue is not the older lady but my dad.  The older lady has fun because like most people she isn't Asian with my dad.
I can never be happy because of my dad.

The people monitoring me in private may not really be doing anything.
It's funny how people are doting on the older lady I like all around, and my body's almost like being flailed into an alleyway, or dungeon.  It's like I wouldn't realize it?


When is my dad emotionally abusing me gonna phase out?  Oh, and I think it's like illegal to say I can't be concerned about it and inhumane and stupid maybe for it not to matter at this point for me.  I feel I'm building my life up, but some intangible things keep bringing me down.

What are these people doing playing "peanut gallery?"

Did some people like this so they could see what I look like when I realize what is happening?


I told my little brother my dying wish, to get off having to take the psychotic med's for my dad.  It's a simple start to a better life, which makes me wonder if my dad is preventing me from having one.  The medicine makes me feel less, a bit more tired, and needing too much sleep to have time to enjoy life on top of "having a life," or career and maybe family.
They are holding out, otherwise, but they keep getting upset if I am naturally upset about it, like that feeling scares them.
They keep being bad to me.
So, why do they make a problem?

Did they make the older lady I like famous only to make me into a problem?
So, I get denied the truth and then later they say, "See?" after I've given up about it.
They keep messing with me between if something is real or not, like it's important to point out.

Monday, June 10, 2019

The people monitoring me in private think I "did something."
I think my dad is mean to me and secretly wants to affect me.
The people monitoring me in private like to hurt me whenever because I can just recover.

They sometimes have a comeback and always see me as bad when I didn't do anything wrong.  I can sense people thinking it's funny, thinking about me?

An Anthem of Me

It seems I met an older lady and often, among others impersonating or maneuvering her, it is swapping places where I don't get anything new anyway... and we are focused on the good parts of meeting someone older, like I "did something," and it's all about her alone meeting older people in these cases and me being sorta ransacked about.

Also, people around me are not being helpful and keep giving off bad influence.
The people monitoring me in private are acting like they're important over me and they have to make me feel bad like the older lady I like left instructions on how to do so for her say.
Do you get a funny feeling you're in trouble for no reason and judged at a microscopic level, while others are not a consideration?

It seems my dad's younger sister, the older one, relaying the message I seem amazing and therefore should matter but that it means being punished for no reason-?  In the end, I'm worse off.
So, I sleep more, but it's probably me being tired from when I worked and didn't get as much sleep.
It seems like an older lady I like actually thought of the idea that I am annoying to her and the people monitoring me in private said it's true.  Like, if I stop doing something so I have more time to myself or for other things etc. that maybe I dwell on the older lady differently.  I'm trying to stay out of trouble.
People are following me and punishing me if they don't like what I say.

Joking Like I'm in Prison Indefinitely

As anyone would say, no one has the right to act like I'm locked up socially.

Sunday, June 9, 2019

Some people think they can tell me what to do and use something someone else does with it or something like everyone has the same exception, no problem, no questions asked.

They keep taking what ruins the relationship.
My brother secretly upset me and surprised me when he said hi at a funny time.

He sat there not moving so I went by.


Do you think that's why my little brother is upset but crazy, thinking he can punish me?  They are ruining the older lady I like, like they always do, some new thing that might be important each time like many times every day for years.

Saturday, June 8, 2019

They keep having more problems.
The cars outside are going crazy selfishly some.
I don't know what to do.  They won't stop.
Did you notice because of my dad it's like I'm always in trouble?

I said his mom and maybe sister/s like to test me, and so they seem to.
They won't stop.  They are being like "brats."

Lie

They want my relationship not to be there and are canceling everything out suddenly.
They seem like since an older lady I like is involved, they are "excited" but "fresh..."

I feel them watching to see if I do anything they are insecure about.  They probably will log it to ruin my relationship if at an end now.

Anyway, something seems weird.
They are trying to permanently disqualify my relationship with an older lady.  My little brother and the people monitoring me in private suggested it.

The people monitoring me in private also of course feel in the right.

It's like I don't matter, like they have free time to dedicate to ruining my life.
They keep doing stuff.
So, the older lady I like is probably feeling okay and me not.  She is probably being indulged against me.
This isn't some joke.
My brother is making sure he can waste my life like my dad.
I am being bothered and singled out that way.  I didn't do anything wrong, no matter what fantasy comes to them.
Wow, like something happened and some people are involved bothering me.
Now what?  Is "everyone just sitting there?"
The people monitoring me in private are oblivious and must just punish me later when pissed off or don't care.
...like this doesn't matter and they are involved.
I feel sleepy people born a certain year.
They won't stop like they wonder what's happening.
So, my little brother also thinks he can tell me what he wants me to do like I'm punished.
Some people don't have to do it in the end.
It still happened to me physically! and they wonder what happened.
I can feel people being bemused like I come to them for comfort when I'm in fake trouble because of their following my dad.
They keep singling me out like I'm bad and "punish" me like sissies in old age.
Why are people ruining my life? and singling me out that way?
They are being bad and now my dad's sister doesn't care.  What good is some of her involvement?...
Their "selfish," "incompetent" insecurities.
Their inklings are making life shit for me.
They keep punishing me for longer and longer and won't stop bothering me.
My brother did something weird and said hi at a funny time, before.  I had my earplugs in, and he said it funny so I said, "What?"

I can feel the older lady getting everything and what I used to have instead and me getting shit.

I actually looked different, and anyway I wasn't bothered about that part when I was talking or didn't say anything at least and it isn't why I said what I said.

So, I'm punished and the older lady gets like spoiled from them.

The people monitoring me in private think I suck up to them when I'm careful.
My little brother acted like he said I have to do this each time of something to do with an older lady I like, and they're just sitting there.
They won't stop.  It's even like something just happened to others.
Because they monitor me in private, and they saw what I thought when I posted something, they acted like something bad happened to me in the same way which involved indulging an older lady I like to it better and it wouldn't stop.

I am not sitting here eager for crap from them, like they pop in like finally they gave an unwanted verdict.
Some people got mad at me without saying why, maybe because I was awkward.  They already were at me for something I apologized for saying, but it wasn't at them specifically.  It's just over, though, like they wouldn't talk to me but strangely to others.  The problem is for some strange reason they are at me racially, and it's bad.  They think it's normal.  There's some new reason... but I don't know what it is, maybe them being mean and having a funny moment is all.  It is wrong and prejudiced to me... technically speaking.  I am good and good concerning race.  I tried talking to some people, but the people monitoring me in private told everyone I was secretly mad and tricky.

Friday, June 7, 2019

I disagree with whoever is pretending to be someone acting weird.
Oh my gosh, people are so into telling me what to do.  Like, no!  Who the fuck do you think you are?
He was acting like he was stimulated like masturbating except he was doing it..
Why is my dad so in my life with the monitoring me in private?  He's getting disgusting on purpose, his own doing.
Why are you laughing my life is crap?  I am not the one who did anything wrong.  You are mean to me.  I am not.  I'm just not dumb.
My dad was being disgusting again.
People are participating like it's politics.  I didn't technically say anything wrong and didn't mean anything bad.  The world can't tell me what to do.
My dad keeps acting like he can get mad at me if he doesn't like what I post online when it's fine techincally.

They said I can’t know the older lady I like because they own the monitoring me in private.

People insist an older lady I like says to do bad things to me.

Thursday, June 6, 2019

Do you want some agreement?  I mean the people spying on me? and afraid to reveal whatever for whatever they wanted?
So, I was reading my blog and realized that if other people were given what I have, they might win because they know I get it if they lose.
Orlando won't leave me in silence.
Problems circulating in Orlando like they're mine sound like "all that" to Orlando.  LA seems like they're on the edge of their seat, which I don't mean as an offense to good people.  Most of them seem okay, though, whatever they're doing.  Anyone get the nature of the ads today?...
My dad acted like it was a joke I should be killed by the older lady I like because he acted like she and someone else were agreeing together to be together like I'm bad and all this was nothing.
It seems I am sitting here waiting for Orlando to "understand," to understand things in my life and beat around the bush at random about it just to hold things "at bay."  It wasn't supposed to get in the way.  Usually, things heal, and I didn't start any problems anyway.

So, they think if I don't just not say anything I'm not attractive to an older lady I like.

They just joked to make her look like something she's not that "she'll kill" me.  They are just being bad pretending I'm joking and did something.
I already separated my issue, that people and the people monitoring me in private following are always annoying me because of what my dad thinks about something to do with me I did...

Who to blame?

It seems like a certain person made people all think of the older lady I like all the time to stimulate her.
They keep acting, well, "stupid," where it's important.
I feel hurt when I'm about to feel good, like something will ruin my life.
People try to reaffirm themselves by acting like I started some things weird.
They keep making more problems, like what if the older lady I like gets coined and I can't have a relationship with her.
Are they uncomfortable about me leaving this issue?

Did I say something wrong just because I said something or thought something ever concerning these things?
They already did it, they are liars.
I was kind of down to 0.  I am singled out for my life to be ruined and it's too late.
So, I tried to do less and be under less pressure, and suddenly I'm being bothered more.
The cars outside keep wanting to know more and find out a word or phrase or topic and it's all the drama and they go around panicking when I'm hurt like their life is at stake.
I think they are being mean to me.
They think they're all that.
They're just talking more trash.
They keep feeding me trash and putting my relationship up at stake as a threat.
I'm not sure if something is serious, but my dad acted like he said I have to be like someone else in something important in a relationship I have that is not good and that I dislike and didn't have to follow before crap.
What if she did it and it isn't that bad, but is it perfect?
You know, I did see the older lady cancel out my popularity and claim I wasn't popular anymore.

She thought she could save me but whatever happened only made it worse.

I don’t come with problems.

Wednesday, June 5, 2019

They keep ruining the older lady I like or use her to bother me.

They keep testing me.

It seems like smeone thinks they can judge me and ruin my life forever.

It seems like they’re cracking a joke.

They think they are so important compared to others.

People hate me more for no reason.

Also, now she gets inappropriate stimulation every day all over the world.

It’s like she got away like it’s serious.

Threy want to make me think of other people more indefinitely.

They keep making a mess of this.

They keep being testy.

They said she even said to make me think of someone for 2 days.

It’s like they lied and planned this all along.

I noticed I just keep being distanced from an older lady I like pretending I should be in serious trouble.  It’s lke all this haunting me is okay all these years.

I guess no one else is!
So, what can you do or say?  I'm worried about the older lady I like because she was nice to me.
Funny how it seems certain people who know each other tend to need to get back at you.
It's probably a sin to find me guilty and unlikely you'd have to comply otherwise.  If so, this is bad.  ...

My mom seemed uncomfortable when we moved from Florida looking back at videos.  My dad seemed like he couldn't or wouldn't do anything.  We moved to the Orlando area, and he became more of a discomfort, and it ruined a lot of people's lives in a chain reaction.
They're trying to force me to be put down with someone else compared to an older lady I like, who has my reputation from me.
Orlando.  Is.  Shit.
I'm against people, including my dad, controlling my life, and at 33.
They just can't get enough, taking turns?
I see it's a system to say I shouldn't be wanted and I'm shit.
People all the time act like all the attention has to go to an older lady I like, pressuring her to have an episode if something is about someone else, to let out a peep.
I'm not the system when people think they realize selfish mistakes.
They just keep speaking in code like something bad has to be said like that's their friendly nudge of another message and they get mad if I feel upset even when just at first.
How gay, people can't shut up.
Supposedly something was for me and everyone pitched in like something wasn't right about that.
This is disgusting.
They keep thinking in their minds they got "the last word in."
Other people are out allowed to have fun, and the only downset is me when before it wasn't.
What's wrong with you?  Do you think I'm stupid?  You've made my life shit and for a long time and without end in sight.  I keep going through this shit, and you don't even know what I'm talking about and act like you don't know stuff and I sit here just playing trivia.
They keep making more problems...
"What a waste of time."
They are trying to assimilate me to people's bad side.
They are bothering me because they are up to no good.
They want me to believe the older lady is stepping back, only for me once a year.
They "have too much time on their hands."
They're punishing me!  Because I feel upset when they disturb my sleeping too much for me to handle.
Can you just stop?  What if someone else dies like my mom did?
Those selfish, "no good" cars outside keep whining that I get something bad.
They won't stop, either the people monitoring me in private or if the older lady still accepts me it's like she did it.
I'm having a bad time being blamed for showing physical signs of anger, even in private.  They have too many grudges on me.
It's like the older lady is punishing me for something...
How dare I talk about my problems??

Well, how dare people make me hated by more people, how is that better?  Is it just in it "by a long shot?"
It's like all the things people don't want were thrown at me and the older lady made my reputation bad, though she's not the type and I'm not saying it in a mean way.
I don't agree on part of people monitoring me in private saying someone is talking to me through them like this, meanly.
Why should I sit here all day listening to these people do this.  I came here to relax.
I am suspicious of how this older lady I like sorta took over my good reputation I accumulated and now says I can't know her.  I'm not trying to be mean, though.
So, because I was upset before my mom died, I lose important things?
They keep pretending I submitted.
They keep acting like someone else is talking to me and probably it's hurtful about her.
The people monitoring me in private keep falling apart.
It seems like an older lady I like had me abused.  I just am not sure and don't think so.
Just sit there and stare like it's ruined, you greedy people!
Everyone is acting like someone did something stupid to me and conquered me.  How greedy, selfish, and worthless these people are...
It's either unfortunate or because of the cruelty.
I don't have much.
I feel people are being mean to me with my mom dying, some lives out there.
They are acting like someone said to abuse me.
They keep ruining my life.  It's like good things aren't happening.

The people in the Orlando area won’t shut up and are acting stupid.

People in the Orlando area are trying to communicate with me nastily and then just leave.

Well, they're acting like I did something wrong at some point in my life.
If I talk about something, they ruin it.
When I post about other people, they think something happened.

Tuesday, June 4, 2019

I can't figure out if it's 2nd nature or the doings of people involved monitoring me in private.
I keep having to monitor what goes on in my body physically by how I feel because I keep getting thrown off.
I'm even more uncomfortable that I'm in trouble for no reason.
Why am I attacked so much these days?  I am tired of being stuck with some of these people.
Whoever this is done for is crazy.
They won't stop ruining it for me.
They keep acting like I should be content I'm "stuck" with someone else she has a relationship while she takes my place in the world and I'm "left hanging."
I hear the cars outside getting their message and saying the older lady I like is indecent.
The people monitoring me in private keep ruining it.

They supposedly made the older lady I like inappropriate.
They keep trying to give me a buzz about problems with her and our relationship, which was fine before they came in.
A car outside thought it would be about the older lady I like, no explanation in English, and I would not know.
They keep teasing me, like it's been constant radar about the older lady I like and our relationship being messed up since 2016.
What's the problem?
They're just taking everything from me like they're supposed to.
They want to punish me every time I post a problem on my problems blog.
It's like she's losing it, and they are being nasty.
The people monitoring me in private keep revealing the older lady I like.
It seems like it's getting worse just for posting here.
People are so excited about this older lady, which I had or was going to have a private relationship with, like I ever mattered.
A car outside said an older lady I like will do something I don't like if I'm "already writing."
They are waiting and then saying she said so.  A likely story she did it alone?
They keep saying I lost my relationship with an older lady.
They keep making problems and more when they make me mad just because I showed a physical reaction even in private.

If something seems off and they have nothing to do, they make more problems.

Monday, June 3, 2019

They said something like it was okay...
They are gonna punish me for squealing in my room when mad.
They said an older lady is said 2 days to think about someone else and then coming back is never or that's forever.

I don't know...

I heard a car go by saying more.


I just thought I'd delete something and was tired and went to bed.
They keep making it hard for me and I look ugly to them because I don't have fine, straight, blonde hair
I'm having troubles from my dad's monetary issues as I save but sometimes something happens.
They kept bothering me like they got all hyper and pressed a button.  They think I shouldn't have spent some money on something, in a special situation.
I'm being intimidated and physically abused that way on my computer.
My relationship with an older lady I like is being ruined and they are trying to find special fault in her.
The people monitoring me in private don't tell me if they really are someone else abusing me online.

Sunday, June 2, 2019

who are involved against me
...but other people can?
Is it already the "plan" I don't "get" anything?
It's not okay, and I don't know how to stop some problems.
They keep coming up with silly problems with what I do, but others are okay for them.
Some people said I did something wrong and it's too late.  Silly things seem to be happening to me.
I guess one thing people use is me because it's something they can agree on that they find no use of me.  That must be like sex, which doesn't even mean intercourse.
Okay...

They are collecting my private thoughts etc. and just punishing me at 33.
Okay, I finally noticed shit that doesn't belong on my blog, so I'll post my problem here.

I was sorta told something was okay and than slammed for it.
How did I get on the bad side of certain people or a facet of someone or them?
They keep going crazy using someone like I did something to mess with an older lady I am supposed to have a relationship with.  They are acting like it's serious now for some reason.
My little brother I live with is acting like I'm menial to him, like these days he is the one who has it together over me, "a likely story."
My brother came in acting like an older lady I like said to say something mean like I was shit if something.

The people monitoring me in private seemed to respond to the idea it seemed like they said something when the page loaded and seemed to say something twice.

Saturday, June 1, 2019

They just went out and did stuff again plus that Central Florida is now under my radar.

In the media, people keep acting like they’re a team 2 women I met teasing me.

People think stupidly like they can be different and ruin my relationship.

There’s nothing I can do but watch them as they ruin my life.  They are never wrong they think.

They keep being mean and are immature trashing the lady I like.

People keep trying to take my relationship away.

They all want to take my relationship from me.

They sure want to pick a fight over that I post here and dislike taking their shit in stride.

What if they keep getting in the way of my relationship?

Someone was supposedly sent for no good reason to sit by me at a movie and said if I “don’t get this she’s a beer and she’s dead.”  Later, he claimed I “can’t have what I want.”

Well, they’re really onto me and crazy and seeing how impressively mean they can be, like someone would hurt them otherwise.

I keep getting horrible news like I did something.